How I can’t take a vacation from my disability

Photo by Leah Kelley on

During the summer months people look forward to going on vacations. People look forward getting away from work or school. I am looking forward to summer break and going to trips with my husband. As much as I love traveling, having a Learning Disability is one thing I don’t get a break from. Many people think that people with them or other neurodivergent disabilities such as Autism outgrow them, or overcome them if they have success. Having a brain based disability effects many areas of my life that I don’t get a break from.

Executive functioning and processing difficulties are issues that I can’t escape from. Problems in these areas, effects how I think, learn and process information. I have trouble understanding and processing what people tell me. Many times people give me directions and I think I understand what they are asking and I may complete the task wrong. People think that when I get something wrong that I’m not paying attention. I am focusing, but listening and understanding are two different things. I often have to teach myself how to learn a new skill, with much practice.

Not being able to drive is another area that I can’t escape from. My difficulties with visual perception prevent me from driving. I’m not able to get in the car and drive myself where I need to go. I need to get a ride from someone who can drive. If I can’t get a ride, I need to walk or take the bus to get where I need to go. Public transportation and places I wish to visit on the bus line are limited. Walking is my preferred mode of transportation, when I can’t get a ride. Living in a central location is essential to my independence.

My difficulties with math is another part of life I can’t take retreat from. I struggle to total items in the store. It’s always a surprise when the cashier totals my items. I truly don’t know how much I am spending. It can also be difficult to create a budget, and to pay bills. I also struggle to figure out a tip when I go out to eat. My struggle with math goes beyond totaling numbers. Having Dyscalculia creates difficulty with telling my left from my right. I am also not able to read the face of an analog clock.

Despite not being able to take a break from my disability, I have found ways to live with it. I have discovered new ways to adapt. Technology has also been particularly helpful. A digital clock or my Fit Bit help me to know what time it is. I am able to type emails and stories on the computer, to be able to share my thoughts with others. Apps on my phone help me to total a tip, at restaurant. I’m also blessed with a wonderful support system who gives me rides and patiently explains how to do the task again.

I can’t transport to a world that is 100% disability friendly. Our society wants to classify people with disabilities or cure them. At times I feel like I am living in a world not meant for me. Having a disability is a journey not a destination. Thankfully there are ways that I can adapt and cope. I have to learn to manage it and make it part of my life.

5 thoughts on “How I can’t take a vacation from my disability

  1. Thankyou for your words!
    They mirror similar circumstances for me.

    I hope you find compromises that work for you and your situation.

    Best Laurence

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I have multiple disabilities resulting from Autism, Traumatic and Hypoxic Brain Injury, Lyme Disease, Neorological Impairments, Back Pain due to bad disk, and developmental delay. Having disabilities a part of who some people are. We just have to do things differently, such as reading, learning, etc. I’m looking at disability as a different ability.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Thank you for sharing your words. the best part of summer is I get to take a vacation from my usual life and roam around in the yard pulling weeds and talking sweetly to the plants as they grow.
    Nothing to do with your words, but can you please change the background to a less bright colour? The fuschia makes it difficult to stay on the website. thanks.

    Liked by 1 person

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